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 Hopeless and Homeless and Lost, Tag: Emilia

Faith Devareaux

Luna
Mutant
29 years old
236 posts
Feb 11 2018, 06:28 PM
T
he house had been finished. Months had past since the death of John Khorun. And god, the tears still bit her at the most unexpected times. Anytime there was a song she wanted to tell him about, a joke she heard, or just to vent about how Robbie, the guy who offered her the world and more just took off when she needed a pillar the most. Lux growing quickly and Faith had done her best to be Mother and Father alike to the innocent mind. With her full time job, side projects, and this looming threat hovering over humanity, being a mother was exhausting. All she wanted was to lie in bed for days and sleep until she woke in the afterlife just so she could see his face.

Her entire life was about independence and yet after his death, Faith couldn't deny Emilia's invitation to come live with her until their new house was done. This was the worst time to be alone, honestly. And if someone didn't hold her accountable, she'd likely fail her daughter. As much as she hated to rely on someone, Faith allowed Emilia to be her crutch, her saving grace. Oh how she cried to the woman at night when work was over and done with and after Lux was put down to sleep. The girl didn't need a crib anymore, and rather than have Khorun help her assembling the bed frame for her daughter, Faith sat amongst the pieces one night, trying to fit part A to part B and then line up slot 2 with slot 1... It was then that Faith had fallen apart the most, knowing that Lux's father would never help her assemble anything for the girl, the girl he wanted to know so much. And it was all because that chance was robbed from him, his life taken from him while she held him on cold cement.

The nightmares woke her through all the hours and he wasn't there to wake her and tell her it was all going to be okay. This was a death that had shaken her to the core, more than the loss of Piotr. Of course it was different. Khorun was Lux's father and their history was long and involved. His death occurred with her present. Thank god it was her eyes that saw the tragedy instead of when she was with Lux. Was it wring to feel thankful that his death happened with her around instead of her daughter? It didn't ease her troubles when she remembered the spatter of his blood on her dress and jacket. His suit jacket still hung in her closet, along with the gown that was ruined. No one would ever take it from her. His leather motorcycle jacket was something she wore often as well, in replacement of her own. There were nights she would spend hours just laying on her side and just holding it while Emilia played with Lux.

The new house was a project for her to submerge herself in, picking out furniture and making it a home for a family that would be forever incomplete. His motorcycle and his truck were in the driveway, just waiting for him to come home and tear off the protective tarp.

With Lux asleep in her bed, Faith sat on the porch of the house Robbie commissioned for them. It had everything she'd always wanted. Ironically. The cool forest air and the pale glow of the moon away from the city was haunting yet calming. A knit shawl around her shoulders, Faith sat on the steps of the front of her house, watching Emilia's car pull into the driveway. The woman was a saint, driving this far out this late to check on her. It was their first week in the new house and Em still wasn't convinced Faith was doing alright. Fake it until you make it, right?

With the months that passed, Faith's appearance changed just a bit. Blonde now, with cheeks hollowed out, some of her curves lost as her grief had struck at her appetite first. Faith was working herself raw to keep from having idle moments like this. She laughed at herself, the result of all her hours and work only leaving her here on her front step with nothing to do other than think about what she could have done to save him. If she picked him from the beginning, things might have been different. If she had picked him first, they never would have been at a masquerade in the first place. The guilt and responsibility of his death hung heavy on her shoulders, something she had to live with every waking moment, every time her daughter wondered why she didn't have a dad... Every father daughter dance, every Father's Day, and the moment Lux was given away on her wedding day.



Emilia Mercer

Tyr Vanth
Enhanced
Many years old
49 posts
Feb 14 2018, 03:01 PM
See the Fire Sweepin' Our Very Streets Today


Lying had come easily to the woman over the vast millennia of her existence. Everything about her identity and existence had been a lie since the moment she emerged from the painful process that Y D'draig Goch had subjected her to. Tyr Vanth had grown accustomed to lies and deceit, and often justified her actions by merely placing herself in the paws of a lion in sheep's clothing. Without that deception she would be outed, and unable to influence the herd to her own ends. Shepherds would swoop in the moment she got close, and she'd be relegated to picking off weaklings and the sick.

Emilia had forgotten what lying felt like. The way that it caused one's heart to beat a few steps faster, and the sour taste the words left in her mouth. Deceiving Faith had reminded her. The first had come early, earlier than any truths that were given. Faith believed Emilia to be her maternal aunt rather than primeval being who'd mothered her bloodline. The subsequent had come in every word of mourning that slithered out from between Emilia's lips. Yet, Tyr Vanth would be remiss to say that no small part of her was joyed to learn of the death of John Khorun. His very existence had been a clear and present danger to Faith and her child, and while she hadn't wanted life to evacuate him part of her knew that death was the only solution.

Though lies had been an integral part of Emilia's existence, she hadn't lied about being concerned for the woman she considered as a daughter. Every one of her many offers of hospitality and safe harbor had been honored; Faith needed a safe port in the storm that Khorun's death and Robbie's evacuation of her life had conjured. A snort flared the woman's nostrils at the thought of anyone abandoning one of her daughters because they weren't enough. Even the woman's driver turned back to regard his employer, but quickly refocused on the road once he realized that the pointed look she offered was for him.

Should Robbie Rider ever return to earth, his visit would be as short as it was igneous.

Ruminations of vengeance hadn't been her reason to appear at Faith's step in the middle of the night, however. Emilia had grown worried for the woman's health in the weeks since she took up residence in the house that Robbie constructed to be her home. Thankfully the curse that she was preparing to sour the property hadn't been completed, else that bit of magic would have surely been the capstone of a rather wretched year. Instead the material components would be devoted to ensuring Robbie's sojourn among the stars was fraught with bad luck. Perhaps even death. Curses were a costly thing to perform, and to simply abandon one so close to completion was a crime in and of itself.

Another snort rumbled from Emilia's nose as the limousine pulled into Faith's driveway; for the second time in as many minutes she'd forced her mind off of a tangent that it threatened to follow. Perhaps age was finally catching up to her. As the long drive came to an end at the foot of Faith's porch she finally got a good look at the beautiful woman that she had loved so fiercely, and her heart sank. Gaunt cheeks. Slimmed curves. Blonde hair. Had Tyr Vanth not also forgotten how to weep, surely her eyes would be filled with tears. Rather than tears, however, her face adopted a look of soft sympathy. It was an expression that few had ever seen, and only in sarcasm.

Once the door had been opened for her and Emilia stepped out, Faith would have seen the impeccable steve madden long sleeved shirt and dark chinos, as well as the designer purse. Louie Vitton, this time. Who had the time to worry over what handbag was hooked into her elbow, however? There was pain in the house before her. Pain that she meant to assuage.

"My dear, you dyed your hair. Blonde is a good color on you," her tasteful smile became more visible as she approached. Faith sat on the steps of her porch, so Emilia was quick to do the same, "how are the two best ladies in New York finding their new home?" No need to delve into the heavy stuff until Faith decided to go there. Months had passed since John's demise, and while Emilia hadn't ever truly known love she'd seen what it did to survivors all too often.

"I'm here to help, darling. Anything you want or need, all you have to do is ask. Even if all you want to do is sit here in silence, for a spell."

Faith || PM me if edits are necessary

Faith Devareaux

Luna
Mutant
29 years old
236 posts
Feb 18 2018, 09:59 PM
E
mila pulled into the drive way. It wasn't unexpected. Plenty of friends and colleagues had checked in on her, dropped in uninvited like she was some random stop at the grocery store. Survival was key in these trying times, meaning she kept on her feet, kept busy with her hands, kept working on what she knew about that specimen from Cairo. Faith didn't even react when Emilia stepped out of her car and came beside her. Eyes remained locked on that one part of the driveway that she'd been staring at for the last half hour. That's how long she'd been out there, right?

"How are the two best ladies-"

Faith could feel the air rush into her lungs. Followed by a lack of airflow. Her face started to get hot, the vessels in her cheeks running like lava and a thickening in her throat appearing out of nowhere. His voice seemed to wash over her senses, remembering him dressed nicely for an interview at Pegasus Tech. They'd gone for a walk with Lux and her stroller and he announced himself with similar words. "How are my two favorite girls-" The world around her started to blur, the memory of him triggered by Emilia's innocent question. The pain she'd felt, like she couldn't breathe, like her entire body was spinning and the world came off its axis. Cupping her hands over her face, Faith keeled over, grief overcoming her in this hour beneath the lunar rays.

The crying spell hit her hard. Unexpectedly. Typically, she was ready for these moments. But only when she was up in her tree where she came to talk to him and tell him how sorry she was. Day after day. After day. And sometimes at night. Tonight, she was too tired to go to that tree. She just wanted peace at her porch. And out of nowhere, his memory was kicked up from the ground. "JOHN!" His name on her voice, a ripped cry of anguish, shook her to her very core and the night of his death came rolling right back to her.

She'd lost him. How did you lose someone?! She let him go. She fucking let him go when she should have had him at home with their daughter, safe or at least in a place where they could fight back like the night they were burgled. Instead, she chose a man who wasn't half the man John was. Every single day, her breath stopped in her lungs, Every single bath, every single flight, every single time she sat in her garage with the car on, she thought things could just end. That her pain could be over. But to make that permanent choice would disgrace him. And he'd call her a coward for giving up and giving Friends Of Humanity what they wanted.

Her cries were a plea, desperate begging for forgiveness, for relief of her pain, for understanding. If she could sell her soul to bring him back, she would. She'd barter everything for him, everything but her child. "I'm sorry. Her sobs echoed in the night, her tears painting this to be an evening of melancholy and mourning. They didn't stop. She would cry. And cry. And sometimes, she'd scream and yell, letting out every raw emotion that she couldn't get rid of throughout the day. Gods, if she'd just listen to him. Even if they didn't have Lux. Even if they'd never had a child. They'd still be together. He'd still be alive.

She found herself thinking about Lux never being born and the pain only got worse. What kind of horrible mother thinks of their child never being born in exchange for John's life? Turning over to Emilia, tears streaking her face, Faith whispered. "I should be in the ground with him. I hate that Logan stopped them."

Emilia Mercer

Tyr Vanth
Enhanced
Many years old
49 posts
Mar 11 2018, 12:10 PM
See the Fire Sweepin' Our Very Streets Today


A void of silence filled the air after Emilia's innocuous, but well meaning question. Her gaze had fallen on the forest surrounding Faith's home; the girl obviously preferred to merely sit in silence for awhile. It had been a desire that the elder of the two women could certainly empathize with. In millennia past, when she had lost her daughter to the cruelty of man, she had been content to merely sit in contemplative silence. There was a certain therapy in sitting alone in one's thoughts, and allowing one's self to wallow in the pain of loss.

Yet it had been months since the barbarian's demise, and one that shouldn't have been a surprise. The man had lived by the sword, so in turn he died by it. The bible was wrong about a great many things, but in that proverb it was correct. No sooner had the thought crossed her mind than a banshee's wail tore her from her mind's third tangent of the night. An anguished cry of pain ripped from Faith's mouth to the sound of the deceased's voice, followed by tears.

Emilia's aura of warmth radiated outwards against the cool winter night in an effort to envelop the woman in something warm. Perhaps she would feel comforted by the supernatural bout of warmth that she had felt. Regardless, Emilia turned on her rump to envelop Faith in a powerful embrace without care for what her tears may do to the designer shirt. The state of some transient pieces of fabric were worthless compared to the esteem she held for the woman in her arms.

"Shhhh," the woman's eyes slipped shut and her hand rubbed the woman's back as her body shook from tears. Emilia's whisper continued after Faith's apology, "do not apologize, my dear. Pain comes in as many forms as there are people, and it's nobody's place to judge the anguish of another. I'm here for you no matter how put together you are. You and Lux are what matters. Everything else can go to hell."

And then she said it. Almost a wish, but not quite. Even so, declarations of what should and should not be could be every bit as powerful, in Emilia's experience. Should's and Should be's became self fulfilling prophecies if care was not taken. Emilia's heart sank in her chest at the thought of Faith in a casket, survived only by a small child. "I said such things, when I lost my first child. I would have traded anything and everything for her back, and I almost did. But I found solace in other things. I threw myself into work and Sophia."

A sigh fell from Emilia's lips.

Only a brief pause told Faith of Emilia's hesitation. Magic was a powerfully unstable force, and in the hands of someone unskilled it could be disastrous. Yet, the spell she considered teaching the woman was not a malicious one; she'd taught it to her first child who used it to great effect. Faith's mother, however, had started with something far more advanced... and was consumed because of it.

"What if I told you that you could speak with him? No catches. No trades. Just... magic?" Emilia's final word hung in the air, her form pulling away so that she could gaze into Faith's hazel eyes.

For the first time in fifteen hundred years, her heart began to beat a tick faster.

Faith || PM me if edits are necessary

Faith Devareaux

Luna
Mutant
29 years old
236 posts
Mar 16 2018, 07:55 PM
T
his was all stuff she heard already, things that set her pain aside and made it generic. She had heard people saying they would pray for her, they would think of her. None of that eased her pain. None of that brought John back. Not a single thing anyone said or did eased her guilt. Nothing would stop her from making the dumb ass decisions that landed John at the opera house that night.

Faith cried that night for both of them. John had been right about Robbie the entire time but Faith followed the instinct that he was good on paper. He had never broke her heart. He was from a good family, and he spoiled her and Lux. Then he finally got bored and went back to space to find himself, to find his legacy, and chase after the man who killed his brother. Because she wasn't enough for him to integrate into this world. And now she didn't have either of them.

Emilia didn't know the half of it. "You don't understand! I killed John! It's my fault he's dead. It's my fault he isnt here. I chose that insufferably Robbie over Khorun because we had a rocky past but he's Lux's dad for Christ's sake. I should have known that he was the one I was supposed to end up with. And he came to find me to talk to me that night and I escorted him outside like he was a fucking dog!" The visuals came back to her, the blood spatter, the sight of the gun pointed in her face as she held the man she should have loved all along. Closing her eyes to block it out, she only saw his face and heard his last words. At that moment, she tensed up and screamed as loud as she could, her voice becoming raw as her scream became a sob into the night.

"I know he wasn't perfect. But who is? And at least he loved me even though I'm such a pain in the ass. He knew he fucked up and he came home to fix his past mistakes and that's more than some of the other baby daddy's of the world are doing. What's most important is that he loves Lux with all his heart and she misses him every day and one day, she's gonna be old enough to look up what happened and see videos of her father being gunned down..." And instead of fighting back and shooting the bitch that murdered John, she just took him into her arms and held him close while his heart eventually stopped beating.

Faith shook her head at the idea of magic. All magic came with a price. She knew that. Emilia just wanted her to feel better. "Please, I'm not that far gone. He's dead. Besides, with my luck, talking to the dead would only have horror movie results."

Emilia Mercer

Tyr Vanth
Enhanced
Many years old
49 posts
Mar 20 2018, 08:02 PM
See the Fire Sweepin' Our Very Streets Today


Looking backwards in the wake of such tragedies was a slippery slope, one that could easily end in a poor place for the woman and her daughter. There was nothing wrong with occasionally slipping away into the past for a fun little walk down memory lane, but to linger over such mistakes was a fruitless endeavor. Though her own mind worked far differently than others; her own mourning period had never really ended for the daughter she'd lost, nor had it ended for Faith's mother. Rather than spout ingratiating platitudes, however, Emilia sat back against the stair and thought.

Contemplative silence filled the void that was left in the woman's comments and scream. Tears much like Faiths had flowed freely down Tyr Vanth's cheeks in the past. Loss and guilt were two fellows that the woman had courted in the past, and still shared a dance from time to time. The truth was that there was little that she, or anyone, could say that would assuage Faith's wretched feelings. Perhaps it would comfort her to know that she wasn't alone, even if the barbarian she cried over had only she and Lux as mourners.

"The past doesn't determine one's future. The only thing you knew was that you were trying to do what was best for you and Lux. Ryder was kind. He was generous. Lux loved him and he gave you so much. I hadn't predicted that he would flee from you the moment that things got hard, especially at such a tender moment." A hand slipped behind Faith's back to gently slide up and down it's length to comfort the girl.

Tyr Vanth's aura enshrouded the blonde in a cloud of warmth in the cold night as she continued, "You didn't kill him. That woman did. And yes, if she looks hard enough she will find those videos one day. But the raw footage is not a thing that most news sources would freely publish. Not even they are so heartless as to show a man's murder on tape." The events leading up to it, and following? Perhaps. But Lux wouldn't see her father gunned down. Not unless she dug through the internet, wading through muck and gore to find it. Perhaps that fact was a little comforting.

A little chortle bubbled out from Tyr's lips at the remark against magic. Not everything related to magic came at a price, though what did was rarely the price one expected. Faith's mother learned of that the hard way, as had so many others. The hand that had rubbed the woman's back slid up to hook around her shoulder, pulling the girl into a warm embrace. "My dear girl, I'm no suburban soccer-mom performing a seance. Magic is my forte and specialty; how else do you think I stay so young?" Em pulled back just enough to watch the girl as she spoke, "I would fulfill all the necessary requirements. 'Tis a simple incantation, one that is perfectly safe so long as you have an object of his."

A warm smile filled her lips, spreading them thin but pulling them apart only just, "besides; if -- and that's a big if -- something goes wrong, I can fix any 'horror movie results' with the snap of my finger and a few words. You would be able to speak with him again, learn his feelings on the matter. However, I will do nothing without your willingness."

Faith || PM me if edits are necessary
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